Now that we are of a certain age, Ma & Pa have decided to drop all subtlety and start asking us flat out when we're going to start procreating because they want grandchildren. Not that they were ever that subtle to me because, hey, I'm a female PhD student who's educating herself out of marriage range. Being the youngest son, they never really did it to Spuey until in the car on the way to birthday yum cha, this exchange occurred:
(Mum) "When are you kids going to go out and get married? I want grandchildren!"
(Me) "Hold on, didn't we have this conversation on Thursday? And wasn't the solution I was going to move to Singapore and get myself a teo chew husband?"
(Dad) "Oh Mooey, be serious...Spuey, do you want to meet a girl? Auntie Footsegay (think about it, Pooey) wants you to meet this girl she knows!"
(Spuey, highly amused) "Who is this girl?"
"Well she's from Vietnam and works in Auntie Footsegay's shop"
"Viet? How much is Auntie getting paid?"
"She's not getting paid anything! Auntie does it for her own amusement."
(Laughing) "Ok, do it"
"She's not pretty"
"What?!!?"
"She's not pretty! She's got big glasses and small eyes...."
(We piss ourselves laughing in the backseat while Mum outlines various signs of asian female beauty.)
Yes Pooey, just be glad you're on the other side of the world.
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