Sport of the Year!!!

Long time readers of this blog will be aware that I try to do something known as *Sport of the Year* - at the beginning of the year, I find a new sport at which I have no experience and try to attain some sort of proficiency in it. Well, I finally have my sport of 2010. It is shooting.

*crickets chirp*

I know what most of you are thinking: *Who is crazy enough to give Mallymoodle a gun?* Well, I was invited to handle some firepower on a wintry afternoon by Mrs. K because she wanted to shoot (a gun) before her dirty 30 and we went to the outer suburbs to the firing range.

Getting attired with my eye and ear protection!

Patiently watching Mrs. K receive instructions and taking aim...when are they giving me my gun?!?!

Possibly kinda important, apparently I'm supposed to hold the gun upsides rather than sideways in my hand

And making sure I point it in the 'right' direction

Getting more advice...although interestingly, not how to aim the gun...

Reloading. As Mr. K said, "Errr...you looked scarily comfortable and competent handling that thing..."

EAT LEAD, TARGET!!!!

"Don't you cheek me, mister!!!*

We both found the experience highly invigorating! You think it's easy to hold up something and aim it at something that's only 20m away, but it's not! Out of 25 bullets, I only hit the target once. I'm not concerned, it just means when a gun is in my hand, EVERYONE is in danger cos I'll spray them anywhere! I hit it more often once I was moved from the revolver to the semi-automatic pistol - when you're shooting one of those, it's like you can just fire away one after the other like a movie, if only I could hold the revolver in one hand and the pistol in the other with crossed arms, John Woo-style! Oooh yeah!

And so, the two of us have discovered a new sporting experience was as well as instilling fear into Mr. K! We're all going shooting again in a fortnight somewhere closer in! Stay away from Port Melb, people!

Peaceful shooting, people!
(Always Asian!)

Stories from the salon - The Cut

I've been thinking about cutting my hair off for quite a while now. A number of factors have resulted in my having long hair for many years. For one, I like the simplicity of long hair - it's perfect for lab work because it's easily restrained, and then it's easy to style it for formal occasions. I'm also extremely lazy and its just easy ti tie back. Also, due to a combination of poverty and time constraints, I don't get my hair cut often - probably around once every six months. But recently it's occurred to me whenever I left the salon that I'd been walking out with what I walked in - long layered hair. And I started thinking: *Time for a change!* and so an appointment was duly booked in 6 weeks in advance

As some of you may remember, I experimented using the InStyle programme. But while the bob seemed to look okay on me, I was unsure about it - especially the bangs/fringe. My female friends were all *yeah!*, while the male friends were *no!*
Or in the case of Spuey, "All girls look better with long hair! Name me one who looks good with short hair!"
My reply, "Audrey Hepburn?"
"Better with long hair."
As time to appointment steadily grew closer, I kept insisting that I was going to cut my hair off, while wondering if I should. Eventually, something made me think of Natalie Portman's character in Closer and the range of hairstyles she sported - pixie, Louise Brooks-esque bob, longer bob, blonde wig, and then long curls.

Wow, she looks good with that hair...just like Pooey, I wish hairstyles came with face transplants

And so I took half a day off work, gave this pic to my hairstylist. Cue this conversation:
"So! Last time you were here, we said we were going to cut your hair off!"
"I still want to but....do you think this would suit me?"
"YES!!!...but I'm going to cut it longer so that it hits your shoulders."
"That's good cos I think she has a longer neck than me."
So I sat back and didn't look up from the magazine as I could feel my hair getting shorter and shorter. And then all of a sudden, we were done! The real shock came when I went to move my hair from beneath my scarf and there was nothing to move!

I went back to work and was met with a number of screams, declarations that I looked younger/sophisticated/peppy/Asian (duh)/good.

Nothing like posing in front of a whiteboard listing experiments to be done

So I guess it's a successful cut and a significant enough change to alter the way I look. Well, except for one person who said, "Something's different' about you."
"I cut a good 15-20cm off my hair."
"No, that's not it."
"Yes, I had long hair this morning and now it's short."
"No, I think it's because you're not wearing glasses."

Painting of the week - Ginevra de' Benci by Leonardo

Leonardo da Vinci, Ginevra de'Benci, c. 1474-8

National Gallery of Art, Washington DC
(Source)

Believe it or not, only about 20 paintings have been attributed to Leonardo da Vinci, two of which have been lost (The Battle of Anghiari, Leda and the Swan), many of which are unfinished (St. Jerome in the wilderness, Adoration of the Magi) and others which are disputed. Ginevra is one of the few (almost) universally accepted paintings by Leonardo.

Believed to be painted to commemorate her engagement to Luigi Niccolini in 1474 or commissioned by Bernardo Bembo with whom Ginevra had a platonic friendship, she gazes somewhat emotionlessly at the viewer. Well-known for her intelligence, the idea that she might have a difficult personality to boot is reinforced by her being surrounded by a prickly halo formed by the bush behind her. That's actually a joke - the bush is her namesake, a juniper

Cakes and cookies and booze!

Today I left work early to bake a cake for ACB bake-off

Caramel and pear upside-down cake aka FAILcake
(It's not upside down, yet)

and then just in case the cake failed (it failed epically the last time I made it), I made some back up cookies!!!

Yes, I baked ALL THESE COOKIES as a back up

And then I went back into the city for dinner at HUTONG with Mischka, Gordo, and The Client. But first, Mischka and I went to 1806 for pre-dinner drinks seeing as the door staff said our table wouldn't be ready for a while.

The 1806 booze wall

My frangelico, fresh lime juice, with a side of soda

Spare cookies for eating

Mischka getting comfy

This is not from dinner, but here's a bonus pic of Pomish pierogi! Miam miam

World Cup Hotties...and an Ugly :(

So! The 2010 World Cup starts on June 11 (yay! and eep!) and to celebrate, I was going to write a post profiling one hot player from each team. Unfortunately, my knowledge of the players on certain teams (e.g. North Korea, Algeria) is not fantastic and the various supplements I've read don't seem to have headshots of teams. The FIFA site does for some teams but not for teams you'd think would have profile pics up such as France and Germany, much to my surprise (but they do for North Korea?!) .

So I've decided to make a hot list based purely on various profile shots that I could find and personal requests from various friends who wanted particular players included in this list (Hai VB! Hai Nance!).

Argentina - Gonzalo (Gonzo) Higuain
The love of vanillabear's life...maybe :P

Australia - Tim Cahill
Sorry, he didn't pose shirtless for his official pic

Brazil - Kaka
So fresh, so clean

Cote d'Ivoire - Yaya Toure
I don't think he's particularly hot, but it amuses me how he looks like you are his enemy and he will get you

Denmark - Niklas Bendtner
Damn Bendtner! (aka pantless Nicky)

England - Fabio Capello
Seriously, after looking at the squad and then seeing Don Fabio pimping it in his profile pic, even KH agreed he was the hottie of the team

France - Yoann Gourcuff
Lashes

Germany - Manuel Neuer
Like a Rolf...okay probably not the best comparison

Italy - Fabio Cannavaro
Cannagrin :(

Mexico - Carlos Vela
Apple Thief

South Africa - Bongani Khumalo
Dimples!...although he kinda looks like 50cent...

Spain - Iker Casillas
My husband the Conquistador

USA - Carlos Bocanegra
Not the best pic of him - the video explains it much better (turn off the sound)

So for those of you are not fans of the game, I hope this has made you all look forward to it! If I've missed anyone or you flat out disagree, feel free to voice your opinions! And in all sense of fairness, I feel I need to include one Ugly to balance the Hot.

Italy - Andrea Pirlo
Poor guy, beaten with the ugly stick

New shoes! And Nostalgia drink!

Last night was an old school drinking/party night and I prettied up to party it out with Mischka at NickChup's bday drinks at The Mint and Merv's goodbye drinks at Manchuria.

I decided to wear a new pair of shoes that Pooey purchased. At 10cm, I decided to wear some flats while driving and because I intended on swinging by the lab before heading out. Turns out that decision was pretty good because Pooey's shoes didn't fit around my heels! I had to shuffle around as though I was a child wearing mama's too big shoes.

And so while I was waiting for Mischka to come into the city, as I gazed down from the corner of William and Lt. Lonsdale, the bubble bridge of Melbourne Central winked back at me and I thought *STUFF IT!! I'M GOING TO BUY NEW SHOES!!!* So I shuffled down those 2.5 blocks and bought myself a pair of these:

These are comments from The Pom after seeing this photo:

The Pom says: dude
The Pom says: i m not being silly but those are AWESOME shoes
The Pom says: they look like they are made from metal snakes

After we got these and exclaimed about how hot they were, Mischka and I decided to have dinner at Oriental Spoon. Alas, there were no Handsome Jacks attending on us. Cafe hiring fail.

Mischka had been o/s and therefore dug straight into the kimchi

My cinnamon tea. A nostalgia drink!

Remembering the good times from 1993

I don't have any pics from the actual celebratory drinks but I'm sure they'll turn up on the book of face sometimes soon.

Song of the week - 愛在西元前 (Ài Zài Xī Yuán Qián) [Love Before the Century] by Jay Chou

I'm so worn out from the SATC2 review, I couldn't be bothered thinking of a piece of art to erase the pain, so I'm bringing you all some classic Jay Chou

Movie review - Sex And The City 2

(This review was pretty much the result of a discussion between me and Pooey that took place in the car after we saw this movie. Spoilers abound so don't read on if you want to form your own opinion.)

Taking place two years after the events of the first SATC movie, after finally getting the things they've wanted for the last 10 years, we see life has not been so rosy for all the girls. Carrie is finding herself champing at the married bit despite finally pinning down Mr. Big, - after a hard day's work, he'd rather stay home and watch old movies while she wants to keep going out and party. Having finally reached a high level in the legal world, Miranda is finding herself faced with the dual challenges of balancing work and a boss who seems to hate her. Charlotte is finding it difficult to handle being a stay at home mother (despite the help of a hot, full-time, braless nanny), and Samantha is in menopause and fighting the loss of her sex drive.

Now, prior to the opening of this movie, I will admit to being a bit alarmed to various reviews calling this the WORST MOVIE EVER - if you can, please watch this highly entertaining review by Margaret Pomeranz and David Stratton. I was willing to bet that all these reviews were from non-fans and thus my expectations would be so low that I'd find this one just as entertaining as SATC 1.

I was wrong. I was so wrong. This movie is abominable, so I'm going to do a formal breakdown of why.

The plot. As Pooey said to me, the first movie didn't exactly break new ground but after a hiatus of several years, it was like catching up with old friends - a natural progression for the time and their personalities. This, on the other hand, was absolutely ridiculous. Part of the 'charm' of SATC series and movie was the dreamland where a writer could afford high fashion clothes and a wonderfully decorated apartment. As we all know, NYC was hit pretty hard by the GFC, but other than Carrie saying the market was not good for selling real estate we get none of that - everyone is still getting along quite affluently. I wonder which writer thought it would be pretty gauche to have them continue to do their high spending ways in NYC...and decided to up the girls up to one of the few places where conspicuous displays of wealth is still okay - Abu Dhabi. And we are hence presented with a heap of scenes that show Orientalism is alive and kicking. Middle Eastern women may all be veiled and therefore freaky-looking, but they're all wearing the same fashion pieces as us! Arab men on the other hand are all conservative and hating on women's freedom and sexuality - the only suitable p33n comes from Europe or the Aussie Rugby Team - cue the budgie smuggler close ups!

This then brings me to the characters, the acting, and the script. When the actors are saying classic lines such as "Abu Dhabi-doooooo!" or " Lawrence of my labia", it's kinda hard to judge if the acting is good. But then, we all know that there have been plenty of crap movies that I've enjoyed usually because the cast don't take what they're saying too seriously. This cast did not do that partly because we all know this was a money-making exercise following the success of the last movie, but also because the characters have basically been distilled to a singular trait that has made them unlikable. Miranda is a Type A who still struggles to balance work and family and spends the holiday planning things for the girls to do, Charlotte spends the entire time worrying about why her perfect life isn't perfect, Samantha still tries to sleep with anyone or complains about menopause and how she can't have her hormone pills in the UAE, and Carrie is still as self-absorbed as ever. As I said to Pooey, Samantha needs to realise the world doesn't run the way she wants it - despite REPEATED efforts from Miranda to explain how conservative the Middle East can be, she has no respect for the public decency laws, can't understand why she gets arrested for kissing someone in public, and then winds up a crowd of men by exclaiming "I HAVE SEX!!!" complete with thrusting. Carrie needs to #@$!ing grow up. Her husband works all day and wants to spend Monday night resting at home. I don't see what's so unreasonable about that but apparently it's something worth getting pissed off about because she wants to attend a movie premiere.

One of the iconic things about SATC was the use of fashion. Part of what makes this movie so abominable is that the costume and styling is bizarre to the point of ridiculousness. At Stanford and Anthony's wedding, Carrie wears a tux - fair enough. But she then tops it by wearing a...headband? Crown? Forehead cover? that makes her look like a witch. Or as Pooey said, "Disgusting." I can't find a photo of it, but if/when you see the movie, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about.

There's nothing outwardly wrong with Charlotte's outfit here.

Except that she's wearing vintage Valentino while trying to make cupcakes with her two kids and then gets angry when Lily puts handprints on her ass.

Then there's this ensemble which Carrie wore to the Souk.

That's right. She wore this to a STREET MARKET.

In one scene, Miranda has organised them to have lunch in the desert, and we're treated seeing them get out in the SAND in their stilettos. That was bad enough. The girls duly complain that they're not dressed appropriately. Miranda explains that since this trip was all expenses paid, she arranged their butlers to get them appropriate clothes.

And we're treated to seeing them stride over the dunes and ride camels while wearing this get up. As Suboo said, "YEUCH! But I feel Charlotte especially lucked out with the spandex!"

The updo was one of Carrie's trademarks, but combined with her long face accentuated by the amount of weight she's lost since the TV series started, the surgical changes and the altered makeup to hide that, not to mention the freaky Madonna arms, this makes Carrie/SJP look like The Alien Queen when shot from the side.

Okay, enough of this. It's like dissecting a car crash.

Put all together, I hope you can all understand when Pooey said her main feeling during the viewing was one of embarrassment for everyone involved in the production, and as a fan of the show. Even our fandom of the show could not erase how painfully bad this movie is. And when you think it can't get worse, there was a karaoke scene where the girls sing Helen Reddy's "I am Woman"

Gor, looking at Carrie/SJP's posing makes me want to slap her

As a happy karaoke-ista, karaoke is about bonding with your friends and having fun. Karaoke is not about singing well and they don't sing well so I won't hold that against them. But karaoke is DEFINITELY NOT about pushing an agenda. We're supposed to feel empowered and cheer along like the rest of the bar audience and again, remember that all women, no matter what culture you're from, are strong and powerful. But it's kinda hard to go *yeah!* when they've spent the rest of the movie basically giving the finger to the culture in which they're meant to be exploring and enjoying.

Despite my blasting, there are a few things that stop the movie from being an absolute shocker :

• The opening scenes showing brief 80s flashbacks and fashions as Carrie describes how they met each other was a bit fun.
• The marriage between Carrie and Charlotte's respective gay bffs Stanford and Anthony is also fun and super campy - Liza Minelli has still got it!
• The sole scene that rung true for me - when Miranda and Charlotte get drunk and discuss the difficulty of being mothers, wanting to work, and how difficult it is to explain that to others.
  
• And...well...I guess the sets were pretty nice, especially Big and Carrie's apartment...

...but that's pretty much it...

And so to end, Pooey told me that since I'd get my review out much faster than hers (if she does it at all), I may use her quote:

"I beg, beg, BEG you, please stop."

That's all that needs to be said.
2/10
Believe it or not, when I started writing this, the rating was actually a 4. After writing and editing this entry, the shockerdom would rear it's head. Yes, it's definitely down there with Paranormal Activity.

Deliciousness at Bistro Vue!

A friend of Pooey's was coming to visit Melbourne so I crashed their dinner at Bistro Vue :D. And when I say crashed, I really do mean crashed because, as a sociologist, he was going to meet Pooey and charge it to work as a "research dinner" - well, as a newly minted PhD, I am also now able to talk about all sorts of topics in a research capacity! Kekekeke.

Because I'm kinda crazy, I decided to walk from uni all the way down to the restaurant. I had 40 minutes and was wearing a pair of kitten heels. The Pom thought I wouldn't be able to do it in time. Well, not only did I make it with 5mins to spare, I beat Pooey and Dr.R to the restaurant! Now, there was a bit of a kerfuffle because I didn't know whose name it was under - not having met Dr. Reez (yet), and the restaurant refusing to give me the names of the other parties of three for that night. Maybe they thought I would steal it, maybe I would...

Anyway, the issue was solved and I opted to sit at the bar rather than sit all alone at the table, waiting for them to drag their drunk asses to the place. I was asked if I'd like a drink while I waited - Gin & tonic? Champagne? I was all "Champagne would be lovely!" until I heard the maitre d'hotel lean over and say, "The Veuve." The barman promptly showed me a bottle of Veuve Cliquot, pulled off the foil, uncorked, and poured me a glass.

Meanwhile, I was slightly freaking out at what that was going to cost
And I sat there at the bar, nervously drinking my (admittedly, lovely) champagne, slightly freaking out and all alone.

Pooey and Dr.R eventually arrived and we were shown to our table where Pooey introduced me as someone who liked soccer - and the conversation went from there! In fact, we had to tell the waitress to give us more time because we didn't look at the menu! When we did eventually look at our menus, we ordered

Escargots in garlic sauce for entree! Miam miam
(Dr. R refused to eat these)

Pooey's main - the confit duck!

My main! - Cassoulet with porkbelly, confit duck, and toulouse sausage!
Also came with a shiraz on the side. Deliciousness and highly recommended!

Dr. R's main - umm....steak?

Side of fennel salad

GOOSE FAT POMME FRITES!!!
*food gargle*

Mini baguettes - these were still warm when we got them!

Doesn't matter what kind of Dr. or Asian you are, we photograph our food!

At this point, I was feeling pretty full. So full that I was contemplating not getting dessert.

WHUT?!

Luckily, I re-entered a state of sanity and got the...

Madeleines
Oh hello! Look at you cute little cakes with your crispy outers and soft tender buttery cakey inners with the sides of apple puree and honey icecream....*food gargle*

Bubbai Madeleine, you're going to good home!

Dr. R's chocolate souffle - when the waitress poured chocolate sauce into it, it rose even more!

Pooey lovingly looks at her rhubarb trifle.

Now at this point, I must mention the party that was sitting next to us. We'd been sitting for a while when a large party of young-twentyish asians sat down. It was an odd party because most of them were dressed smart/casually in jeans and tshirts and yet one of them had a fascinator on her head. I'm not sure how to express how annoying it was seeing that GIANT BOW on her head. Inappropriate headwear! Turns out one of the party was having a birthday. We know this because they sang *Happy birthday* and we joined in, especially on the *hoorays!*

I think we ended up being the second last party to leave at the end of the night. Good food, good convo, good sociological research, and only one stupid hat.